Thursday, March 26, 2009

A Man Is Not The Answer To Every Problem. More Fuckery.

And the fuckery just does not stop.

So, I was speaking to my friend after a long time yesterday and she starts telling me about all her financial problems she's been having since she got laid off. After about an hour of crying and complaining, her tone of voice suddenly becomes optimistic, it was if she had an epiphany, the most absurd and stupid epiphany I have ever heard. She proceeds to tell me that the only solution to her problem is finding a man that can fulfill her emotional and financial needs-her epiphany. SMH! One of the most important lessons I have learned in my dating experiences is that it's impossible to make good decisions on who you need to date when you're in the midst of a major life crisis.

When you've been laid off of work and are damn near filing for bankruptcy, you don't need a man. You need to go out looking for another job.

When your situation at home with your family/rommate is so bad that you spend as much time as possible out of the house or locked in your room, you dont need a man. You need to find a new apartment.

When you're all depressed and suffering becuase you found out you contracted a STD, you don't need a man. You need a fuckin doctor.

Having a man is not going to make the mess you've made of your own life magically turn out alright. It's up to you to save yourself. This is extremely hard for you serial lovers, the chicks who stay falling in love at first sight and meeting a different soulmate each week. Yea, - know when your in love, all the shittyness of life morphs into vibrant color and even annoying ass people you can't stand, become tolerable. But most times love at first sight is like hope at first sight. Or "desperate need for a mate to get through this shit I'm dealing with" at first sight. Or maybe even "mind blowing fuck that can make me forget that I am about to get kicked out my apartment 'cause I can't pay my rent" at first sight. Sad. I know you are smiling and shaking your head while you are reading this because you know someone who fits the description. Seriously though, that bum ass nigga you pick up at the club–in my case, figuratively, not literally–is not going to make your life any easier. He's going to be one more fuckin problem for you to solve.

Please do yourself a favor(and the sorry sap who will have to put up with your shit), and just start solving the problems you already have instead of pulling other people into your already fucked up life.


  1. Fucken Beautiful Words, Spoken Like a Real Bitch that handles her business. I like you, good ass post, I need to email this to a few folks.

  2. A man will only makes things worse in her life. Not only that, but when he realizes he is partly there to serve as her personal bank, he will be out with the quickness.

  3. well you know people aren't as independent as they may pose to be. Some people need other individuals to validate them, or for them to feel like somebody. You're homegirl is VERY dependent to come up with an "epiphany" like! STAY AWAY FROM HER...MISERY LOVES COMPANY, thats why she called after so long...she was miserable!

  4. "How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.” Anais Nin

  5. Okay...I did the "Let the church say amen" type hand wave when I was reading this. This needs to be printed and put into the female handbook, things would go alot smoother if everybody realized this